Do not listen to the bogan when it says it doesn’t care about politics, for it is lying to you. Bogans are remarkably passionate about exercising their right to vote in a democratic system, and the examples are abundant. No, you won’t find the bogan handing out “how to vote” cards at the local polling booth, and you won’t find it carefully scrutinising the latest piece of political analysis in a broadsheet newspaper. That’s because it is too busy participating in the political process to have time for any of that shit.
It will spend hours per week getting informed prior to voting, and, when alone with its friends, it will engage in spirited debate on the issue of the day. If disagreed with, the bogan will explain its rationale in an animated manner, though ultimately accept those with a difference of opinion without resorting to violence. The bogan still remembers who it voted for back in 2004, and often mutters in disbelief to itself when reminiscing about how it turned out. But while it can sometimes be a nostalgic creature, it retains a keen focus on the present. The moment that the bogan casts its vote, it feels a rush of adrenaline and faith in the process. It is convinced that its vote may be the crucial one that determines the outcome. The vote that ordains the next Australian Idol.
As it presses the “send” button on its phone, two things occur. Firstly, the Legion Interactive SMS service becomes 55 cents richer. Secondly, the bogan becomes an equivalent amount poorer. Such is its fervour for the political process, the bogan will often vote dozens of times. However, the bogan’s love of voting is not confined to Australian Idol. It will vote on any number of other television programs, Today Tonight polls, or newspaper polls to determine once and for all whether Kyle Sandilands acts in poor taste or not. It will vote for the Hilltop Hoods in the hottest 100, regardless of whether they released a song that year. It even extends to the internet, where the bogan will click on any pop-up ad requesting its vote on anything whatsoever. In its more quiet moments, the bogan pauses to remember the 2004 election. It just can’t accept that Casey Donovan beat Anthony Callea.